Having a random hookup so left but love u
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
