Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
