TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
