I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize