these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
