DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
