He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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