Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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