What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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