She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
