I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
did i just pee glitter
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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