had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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