I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
