I got chris browned last night
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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