i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
