Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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