i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
