Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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