Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
sarcasm needs its own font
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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