Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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