Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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