i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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