ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
