I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
