somebody snuck up and got me drunk
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
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