Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Holy shit dude........stairs
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
