Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
