we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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