come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Randomize
