Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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