so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
