IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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