Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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