sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Randomize
