She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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