You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Randomize
