I wanna bring you to show and tell
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
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