This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
