Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
