he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
You know, be my cock's hype man.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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