this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
