Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
