I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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