I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Randomize
