just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
