i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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