i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
