I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
the raccoons are back...
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