I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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