You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
